Dear Someone

By Peter Omn 

I occasionally feel foolish for sending you letters without knowing whether or not you find any meaning in these vistas of hope. But I suppose I'll carry on writing to you in the hopes that anytime you feel lonely, especially around a holiday and during this season, these letters will serve as a reminder that you have always been in my thoughts and that you will always remain dear to me for a myriad of reasons.

 

I know that asking how you take your coffee on Easter Sunday or how you plan to spend your day should only have one answer - with the one you love. Unfortunately for many, it's not that simple.

For many people, this time of year can be challenging.  There are those who are embarrassed by their feelings for the one they love. Embarrassed for keeping their feelings alive or that true love, peace of mind, and companionship are not for everyone.

 

There are those who are struggling with being single, feeling like they are not good enough or that something is wrong with them. Some carry a heavy heart but pretend that everything is fine to everyone else.

 

If you can relate to any of this, please know that you are not alone. You are not alone for wanting others to learn more about you. You are not alone for wanting others to know the reason why you are silent or lonely, even when they are there with you. You are not alone for wanting others to trace your weakest spots. You are not alone for wanting others to love you because many have tried and failed.

Unfortunately, life can feel like a silent hell and emotionally heartbreaking when you are not loved for who you are, but rather for someone else's idea of you. Life can even become a silent hell if you are still lonely when with the one you love or a spouse.

Life can be like a silent hell if you always have to make yourself small just to fulfil somebody's fantasy. Life can be like a silent hell if you always have to beg to be held and accepted for who you are.

 

Life can be like a silent hell if all they are to you is nothing but a source of pain, instead of someone who brings joy and comfort to your soul with their presence. Life can be like a silent hell if you keep apologizing for demanding what you want and how you should be treated in a relationship.

 

Life can be like a silent hell if you are treated every day like an object or piece of property that is manipulated to do what they feel like and when they feel like it. Life can be like a silent hell if all you desire is to disappear from life as you know it and completely reinvent yourself in a city where nobody knows your name.

But there is hope even if you have lost your smile. There is hope even if you are acting like you don't care on a day like this, even when you do. You can stop expecting so much from others and learn to be content with yourself. Being alone does not make you lonely. It is being surrounded by the wrong people that can make you feel truly isolated.

 

You can end this day with a positive thought, no matter how hard it was. Remember that tomorrow is a new day, and a new opportunity to make things better and a day after resurrection. Hold on to positive thoughts, even in the midst of difficulty. Be grateful for where you are and those who are not there with you, knowing that moving forward means leaving something behind—and usually it's a part of ourselves.

 

I believe that there is a day coming when you will not have to hide the darkest parts of yourself, and someone will choose to stay with you anyway. One day, you will find someone who accepts every part of you, someone who stays even when things get tough.

Don't be afraid to take another chance at love or to embrace a new relationship, even if it means risking being hurt again. The best things in life are often found when we least expect them. 

Until then, know that you are loved, and that you matter. 

 

Peter Omn 

peteromn@yahoo.com

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